faithactionreconciliation

I'm just getting new to this whole idea of 'Weekly Blog' and to be quite honest...it's scary! I mean, sure I enjoy my own writings from time to time and I've dipped my hand in poetry on more then one occasion but to have a dead-line of EVERY WEEK! Argh! I can feel my mind pulsating as I toil over things to write. "Should it be a work update?" I question myself, "Should I write a spiritual reflection? Or how about a poll of who prefers Blondes over Brunettes?". My mind races the clock as the day grows older. I come back and forth to this task, juggling it with my work like I'm my own act in the Festival of Fools.

Suddenly......the revelation comes! An Update: I'm starting up at Common Grounds soon as a volunteer on Wednesdays! So if you're in the Holy Land on Wednesday mornings, stop on by. :) More on that to come.

Here's a photo for your view pleasure...



--El Matador Miguelito
www.myspace.com/mikeyprice

Hi, to all our wonderful people who are reading this blog...
Blessings From our Father:

My name is Lidia Lammardo, i am called Miss Argentina, and i have been working in Ywam Belfast, since 2005
I am currently organizing a 2 weeks outreach to Bethlehem...Having been there twice, i can tell you that the experience has been enjoyable, bringing personal growth as i was available to share my time and life with the community there.

So, i thought of posting this email with more details concerning the trip to Palestine, and you can pray and consider if God is leading you to come and be part of it...

We are planing to leave from Heathrow Airport, England, on Monday the 16 of July, and come back on Monday the 30 of July.
The first week will be kind of an orientation week, listening to the stories of jews and Christian Arabs who are involved in reconciliation work, doing some prayer walks and meeting the Christian community in Bethlehem.
The second week, we will be spending time doing practical work, in refugee camps, farms, orphanage and doing some youth programs. It is going to be hot, the weather will be nice, and no rain!!! I feel i have to clarify this fact with our lovely people from the UK, who are in love with the weather here!!!
But we will do some indoor activities and try to keep the afternoons free, when the sun is stronger.
I guess, in our hearts we desire to bring some encouragement to our brothers and sisters in Bethlehem, weather by sharing with them, praying or serving their country with our hands and work.

The cost: £320. It includes transport , accommodation, food,materials for the practical work and speakers gifts.
Every participant will have to cover his own plane ticket. You can check in British Airways, for direct flights to Tel Aviv.

I will recommend you to confirm with us as soon as you know that you will be coming, so you can get your plane ticket earlier and cheaper, in case of wanting to go ahead, just let me know, and i can send you an application form by email, with your personal information.
Finally, application forms will be received until the end of May. We can take some cases in consideration but it will depend on the matter of the delay.

Hoping and praying God will guide you in His will. Chau, Lidia...

Every blessings...Lidia
www.myspace.com/lidia_lammardo

what a groovy weekend. jon had to go up to the north coast to corrymeela (http://www.corrymeela.org/ ) with ikon (http://wiki.ikon.org.uk/wiki/index.php/Main_Page ) to plan their service at greenbelt (http://www.greenbelt.org.uk/ ) this august bank holiday.

turns out that the family of another guy involved in ikon had a caravan (trailer) right down the road and a 30 second walk from the water. they offered it to us so the kids and i could go up as well.

it was a really nice time for us- we've never been anywhere as a family without any sort of agenda. sure, jon had an agenda, but the kids and i didn't and hung out on the rocky beach collecting stones and shells and throwing them back in the water, walking out on the huge 'continents'- as iain called them- and trying not to slip on the seaweed. even though the sky was cloudy the air was warm and it was just so lovely.

we also got to have our meals up at corrymeela and it just so happened that a cross-community womens' group from belfast was up there with their kids. while the women have met together over the past year or so, this was the first time their children had met. it was just a joy to hear everyone chatting and the kids playing the way all kids play. my two, iain and eilis, had a good time meeting and playing with the other kids, too.

on a totally other note, dr who was pretty good this week! since it was the first of a two parter it was more of a set up for next week, but left on us with a good cliffhanger- a human/daleksec hybrid! weird! dunno how a more easliy killled dalek is supposed to be as scarey, but i'll just have to wait to see how it all unfolds on saturday night. i'm also liking martha, the doctor's companion more every week. the doctor's also toned down his shoutiness this season so he's not nearly as annoying as last year. so, whooooo!!! daleks!!! wheeeeeeeeeee!

--
We must repudiate either one of the two: Christianity with its Love of God and one's Neighbour, or the State with its Armies and Wars...Christianity, with is doctrine of Humility, of Forgiveness, of Love, is incompatible with the State, with its Haughtiness, its Violence, its Punishment, its Wars. -- Leo Tolstoy

Hello again,

So here is another update on Belfast Boys Model. We met with the same students again this week and took a look at Anger and how this plays a role in the Forgiveness Process that each of us goes through. Through various mediums such as skits, small group discussions, and video clips we were able to talk about the various types of anger and how it is important to acknowledge your anger and hurt and process through it so that you do not bottle it up. The boys really seemed to get the concepts and the feedback from them was great. They are a really interesting and diverse group of boys and I am glad for the opportunity to journey with them through this Forgiveness Curriculum.
That's it for me. I will talk to you again next week and continue with the updates on BBMS.

Cheers,
Becki

I'm currently reading a compact little book called "How the Irish saved civilisation" by Thomas Cahill. It's hardly a heady historical work but is a very simple reflection on the influence that Patrick and his Christian successors in Ireland had on the world. An influence that saw the preservation of much of classical culture, history and knowledge that was under threat following the demise of the Roman empire. Central to Patrick's work of course was the creation of an organic Christian movement in Ireland that changed the face of this nation for good, and deeply impacted the history of the world Christian movement for the next 1500 years.

In the book Cahill talks of Patrick's lengthy stay in Ireland as a youth when he was brought here as a slave, years of struggle and torment. Patrick ultimatey escaped miraculously from his slavery. At the time he wouldn't have known that he would be returning to this land, of his own volition, a generation later with a determination to bring the beautiful message of Jesus to a people that had no knowledge of this first century man from Palestine. In fact Cahill believes that Patrick was the first person ever to go as a missionary to an area considered 'barbarian', beyond the reaches of the Roman empire.

At this time there were many in Britain that made journeys to Ireland to grab slaves and take them back to Britain to work for them. Due to his first hand knowledge of the inhumanity of slavery Patrick became convinced that Christians should have no friendship with any who kept slaves. He wrote a letter to British Christians imploring them to have nothing to do with slave keepers. Cahill says "the greatness of Patrick is beyond dispute: the first human being in the history of the world to speak out unequivocally against slavery". Indeed he goes on to say that "nor will any voice as strong as his be heard again till the seventeenth century" on the subject of slavery.

One of these recent 'voices' was that of William Wilberforce who was the subject of the recent film 'Amazing Grace'. He was at the forefront of the movement to abolish slavery. This abolition 200 years ago was commemorated by a month long walk down the length of England which our R-DTS joined for 4 days. This walk, in yokes and chains not only remembered the abolition of slavery but drew attention to the fact that there are over 10 million slaves in the world today, many being used to harvest cocoa beans so we in the West can eat nice chocolate. Above is a picture of our team members on the walk and it also advertises an upcoming march. I encourage you to look up www.lifelineexpedition.co.uk and think about joining this march. St Patrick walked through life consistently defying the unjust norms of the society that was around him, let us walk in his steps today in the 21st century. Peace, Jonny

It is the season of Easter currently in the church calendar. The church calendar always gives us 50 days of celebration from Easter Sunday to Pentecost – it is because the 40 days of reflection, repentance and fasting of Lent are always followed by a more lengthy time of celebration.

And it is timely to consider the Holy Spirit. We are perhaps used to many doctrines about the Holy Spirit – doctrines which are sadly used to divide. The praying in tongues, the manifestations of the Holy Spirit, the gifts of the Spirit – these are often the things which are used to decide whether one is in or out.

But I want tonight, here at Springfield Road, on the peaceline between the Falls & the Shankill to bring attention to something quite different. The ministry of unity of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit who, the western theological tradition, is the personified love between the father and the son. The active principle of love actually personified.

No wonder then, that the promise of the Holy Spirit was something that Jesus made, as he was aware that a time of crisis was coming for his disciples. There was nothing more beautiful & encouraging to promise. This was means to be a comfort, and a strength.

Rather than the indwelling of the Spirit being determined by whether one believes in one particular manifestation of the Spirit in the Church or another, I would like to ask a different, but yet, related question: What does it mean for us to have “accessibility” to the one who is living love?

From what I heard while on retreat in Taizé, Brother Roger was a man who had not had the easiest experiences of childhood. He seemed to have a singularity of self-awareness. This level of integration sat well with a man in his advancing years, but my guess is that it would have been a burden for a child who was growing up. One of the themes frequently repeated throughout his prayers is the prayer that puts the words we need into the hands of God. He would say things like:

“God, you have the words we need. In our wordlessness, your spirit groans for us. We rest in this knowing with peace”.

John Paul II said that when a person feels the prompting to prayer they may sometimes feel a distinct awareness of their prayerlessness. This prayerlessness may cause a certain depression of the heart, and a disempowering of courage, and a silent chasm. As an alternative John Paul II proposed that we understand the impulse to prayer as always and everywhere an invitation of the Spirit who is already with us, already groaning in us. Instead of an examination which we always perform poorly at, we should rather understand it as an invitation that is always prompted by, and assured of welcome.

This then, is the ministry of the Spirit that I want to highlight for us in our evening of prayer – the ministry of welcome, of vision, of truth-telling. Of leading us, through prayer of the heart, and through action in the community, to a vision and a loving encounter with Jesus, the one who is truth. This “ministry of the Spirit” rather than being seen as the battleground for divisive doctrines should rather be seen as something closer to the ground of our being, to the love by which each human being lives their lives, the actual principle, the kernel, the nugget and heart of love at the centre of the Trinity.

It's spring time here in Belfast. The flowers are blooming...the butterfly farms are open...the bonfires are being built for the 12th of July...."What?! Already?!" was my reaction yesterday to seeing the wooden crates pilled high on the Lower Shankill. I'll save all my comments and opinions on bon-fires to a strictly 'off-line' plane. But soon again, flags will burn, people will drink, and communities will be warm. Here's some pics I took from last years fire. (please do not use with permission)

--mikey

YFC, Milking, and Rwanda
Hello home! I'm in Kigali, Rwanda. My team and I just arrived last night via a long bumpy taxi ride from Gitega, Burundi. The last few days in Burundi we spent at an orphanage run by Youth For Christ. The work that YFC is doing there is incredible - they are currently running a home for 13 children orphaned from the war and HIV/AIDS. They are pioneering a new mission to affect the surrounding commuinity which involves building a primary school, a training centre and an extension on the orphanage to take in more kids. Our team helped the construction by hauling bricks and then hung out with the kids too. 13 kids all under the age of 5 = some pretty good times.

Oh, and I can't forget... YFC has a bit of a farm and I was out there, helping with the milking. It was great to be out in the crazy jungles of Burundi, milking cows. I loved it! One night I was out there milking, it was dusk, just after dinner. We had just had the little calf in there drinking from its mama to get the milk started and I was sitting on a little wooden chair, my head rested against the mom's side thinking, 'man, I could do this everyday'. Africa is wonderful and I am so Albertan. Woo who!

Now our team is back at the YWAM base in Kigali, Rwanda, getting ready for the adventure here. Thanks for all of your prayers! Oh and an update on the break in and stolen items: It looks like its going to become more complicated. There are a lot of details that I wont go into here but basically the hotel is being held responsible for what happened because of the safety of the rooms and the placement of the theives (the theives that robbed us were in rooms right beside ours so it looks like an inside job). However, the hotel is not willing to take responsibility so some legal action might be required. Right now, I continue to be concerned about our team... now that we've left Burundi, it seems to be really sinking in that we've lost some valuable items, some that represent a lot of hard work (laptops), and its discouraging. Thank you so much for your prayers as we press through. I really want to ask God for a miracle - that what was lost would be recovered.

Lots of love, Christy

Hi, this is from Erin's xanga (www.xanga.com/ulsterpeace), it made jenn and I cry this morning when we read it. We are so proud of our teams in Rwanda and Lebanon at the moment...

lebanon week 3 & 4
week 3 and 4.

(pictures just aren’t happening…there’s been a slow internet connection…but please don’t let that stop you from reading on!)

Much has happened! And as we reach the ½ way mark of this grand adventure, I’ve been wondering how to communicate some of the exciting things that have happened. Instead of going through the itinerary with you, how about I just give you some stories?


king’s kids camp

Last week the team and I spent our time at an overnight Kid’s Kings camp that was held in a school. Along with a team of YWAMers from here and other helpers, the camp went off well, with an emphasis on Forgiveness and walking closer with Jesus. It was definitely a change of pace, keeping up with 9-16 year olds for four days!

The highlight for me was just to get to know some of the kids in a deeper way than I’d get to if we were just doing an assembly at a school, or some one time presentation. Throughout the week, our team presented our Forgiveness Programme in 6 different ½ sessions. I loved putting new creative twists to the programme—making banners, more interaction with the kids, new movie clips, and using different aspects of faith and of the intricate story of Joseph in Genesis.

On Thursday, we took the 30 kids from the camp into the very centre of Beirut. Right now there are thousands of people camping near there, and have been for months, to protest the government. Because of the protestors, many people have abandoned city centre, and for the lack of people there, many shops have shut down. The kids felt that they should go there and pray. It was a powerful time, watching children take leadership in prayer and vision for their own country and government.

louizeh evangelical school

This week we’ve been in an evangelical private school that’s about a 40 min trip from where we’re staying in Damour. When the school read about the curriculum we want to bring, they wanted us to come and take each of the 2 chapels in the morning, and every bible class that they give throughout a week. That’s somewhere close to 20 different sessions we’ve done! (It’s given me a new appreciation of teachers—your poor feet and backs! And vocal cords!)

The school is very special, with a broad range of backgrounds of the students. Though it’s an evangelical school, 70% of the students also come from either a Druze or Muslim backgrounds. Knowing this, we were advised to present our programme from a secular standpoint. Some, when religion or Christian faith is mentioned from the front, will switch off. We definitely didn’t want any kids to switch off, if we could help it, as we were coming with the message that any human is capable of giving forgiveness—this is not a value saved only for those in the Christian faith.

During our times in the classes, we spoke about Northern Ireland, and used its history and reconciliation process as a neutral way to talk about forgiveness and reconciliation. Those of you who have felt it in your heart of hearts that Northern Ireland is meant to be a blessing to many nations—we’ve seen that first hand this week. Though none on our team is from Northern Ireland, we tried to represent this land we’ve come to love, as best we could. As we spoke about Belfast and the people there, and spoke out people’s stories, we heard students and teachers make connections between Northern Ireland and Lebanon. Two geographically small countries that have caught the world’s attention at different stages.

Also during our classroom sessions, we would open up the time for questions. Usually we had more questions than we could answer in the time we had. If the questions the students were asking were any reflection of the deep thought processes that were going on in their heads and hearts, I would say that forgiveness has started to take root at Louizeh’s school.

I had a few experiences this week at the school that I really want to share. One thing you must know as I write, is that this group of students is not just dealing with forgiveness on a personal level, but also on a national level. A lot of their personal hurt has been caused by bigger powers, groups fighting on their own soil. Maybe that’s different than some of us, and it definitely challenged the borders of forgiveness—how far does it go, really?

One day during a chapel with the older students, David decided instead of telling his story, he wanted to continue the discussions and processing people were doing. So for 5 minutes, the chapel filled with over 200 students started buzzing. The seven of us spaced ourselves out best as we could. I headed to the back, and as I climbed the stairs I realized I was headed into dangerous territory—the 12th grade boys.

I sat down behind a row, and five or six young men turned around. After the awkward chit-chat that has to happen when opening up a conversation with strangers, one said, “He has a question to ask you, “ and nodded toward a young man that was sitting in front of me on my right, a guy with glasses, light skin and dark hair. He was shy but direct. He looked at me and asked, “You’re American?” I said yes, and he explained that he’s from the south of Lebanon. And then he asked, “Are you saying that I should to forgive Israel for what they did last summer?” I actually attempted to answer his question, and I don’t think I finished a single sentence, but sort of rambled on…then when my heart caught up with my mouth, I froze.

When I stopped talking, I started crying. The young man said, now him with tears, too, “I saw kids without heads or hands…”

And then I said to him, trying to speak clearly, though we were both emotional, keeping eye contact, “Maybe I should just stop trying to answer your question. I think you need to know that I am so sorry about what happened in your country last summer. And I want to apologize for America’s role in the suffering.” I didn’t know where that came from! I’ve heard of people asking for forgiveness on behalf of different nations and peoples, but I’d never thought I would feel in a place to do it. But then I found myself in a hard wooden chair in a school in Lebanon, 2 feet away from someone who experienced and saw and heard things that no human should ever have to. And how could I ever ask him to forgive his enemies if I couldn’t ask his forgiveness?

(If this is hard for you to read, or hard for you to get your head around, it’s ok. It’s hard for me, too. I can’t explain or understand governments or voting processes or international relations. But I think perspectives start to change and soften when you’re close to suffering, or someone who’s suffered. Jesus was close to suffering, and he gave answers in the forms of stories about seeds, trees, houses, birds…There’s an “everyone’s welcome” feel to this Kingdom, and that’s what I base my apology on.)

One class’ question and answer period was harder than others. No one seemed to have any questions. After what seemed like an agonizing eternity, one 15 or 16 year old boy raised his hand in the back of the classroom. He asked firmly, “So what am I supposed to do with the anger that has haunted me for my entire life?”

Because we were presenting secularly, it does not mean that we do not feel the movement of the Spirit, especially when answering questions from the classes. I said something to him about how I might answer his question, if only he hadn’t said the bit about haunting him for his whole life. My heart in that moment was broken for this tough boy in the back of the class, who did not break his stare. I talked about anger, and how some things have built up over time, so that as time goes on, as 15 years has passed in his life, the haunting anger (what a phrase!) becomes more and more unshakable. I told him to take time, to give himself time with himself and with a trusted friend and a school counsellor, to just begin to help, that is—if the question was about him. Coral added brilliantly about how anger sometimes comes after you’ve been hurt, or after something wrong has happened. She challenged him to do something positive with the anger, so that the same sort of hurt won’t happen to someone else.

The bell rang and we exited the class on our way to the next one. But David shared that as he was the last one leaving the class, that same young man came up to David and look intently at him and said, “Wait, I need to tell you. No one has ever been able to answer that question before. No one. Thank you.” And he shook David’s hand and walked away in a hurry.

From the older classes we entertained a lot of questions about peace and war, about America and the UK, about forgiveness on a grander scale, and forgiveness against the disastrous things that happen in life. To the many-times-asked question, “Is forgiveness always necessary?,” we answered over and over again, “We believe it is.”

During a younger class, a boy in the front finished our time with this group of students by raising his hand and asking this question: “When all the walls come down in Belfast and Northern Ireland is totally at peace, where will you go next to fix the problems?” Another one said, “Yeah! Come to Lebanon!” We all got wide-eyed and big-hearted and just “aaaawwwwwwwww-ed” at the boy! The sweetness and innocence of a child’s hope is sometimes hard to take into our reality-coated minds.

Several students came up to us and spoke about friendships that had been renewed during the week through forgiveness. One girl found it particularly helpful that we said that “Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting.” Another young man I spoke to during one of the breaks ended our conversation with saying that this whole concept is new to him, and to many in the school. I find that exhilarating! Bringing a Kingdom principle freshly to someone is like sharing Jesus with an “un-reached people group” for the first time.

Kids say funny things, too! One guy brought me a floppy disk and said, “Here, there’s a file on here with an image of God on it.” So let it be known, someone in Lebanon fit God onto a floppy! Another young man came up to me today, extended his hand and smiled, and then as we shook hands said, “Interesting outfit!” Listen, you gotta get creative when you pack a small bag for 2 months!

letters for lebanon

After every class, we read excerpts from the beautiful letters you emailed and wrote. When we read the parts of your letters in class, I loved saying, “from Ruthie in Northern Ireland,” or “from Jan in Missouri.” We truly feel we’re representing many more than just the seven in our group. Also, people have taken the book and read it all the way through, and have been deeply moved by your prayers and words of encouragement.

Thank you for your prayers for our team, for guidance, and protection. We have undoubtedly felt led and safe. Next week we are going to American University in Beirut (AUB) to give 3 seminars on Forgiveness at a student center, again we’ll be doing this secularly.

I should really thank and honour a few people—Jihad Nasr, our host; Dr. Steven White, principle of LES; Cecilia, guidance counsellor at LES; all the bible class teachers who let us take over their classes for a week!

Click on the wee Photos to watch some videos about US!

Currently Listening
Kill Them With Kindness
By The Jealous Sound
see related


I'm sitting at my desk, pondering the existence of man and drinking my wonderful coffee just the way I like it; milk with honey. (hmmm...it's quiet, think i'll put on some music now) (anyone fans of The JealousSound?)

What's in an occupation? My job right now, on 'practical' terms (i don't like that word) is on-line administrator for this ywambase, handling the accounts, and trying my hardest to keep an update onregistrar. On 'unpractical' terms, or the non-physically tangible areasof my mission work, are summed up in the way that I live my life. (Letme know when I loose you.)

These last three months have really got me thinking about my life and my occupation. What does it mean to me to be a missionary? Well...if you got answers, please let me know. ;) This past easter marked the 20th year that I've been a believer in Christ. And from those 20 years, the last 15 I've set my heart onbeing a "Missionary When I Grow Up". Originally this thought was extremely scary. Being eight years old and sitting in the uncomfortable church seats, listening to every visiting pastor whotraveled through my small Floridian town, my child brain, filled with bravery and fantasy, imagined that "I'm growing up to move to Africa and am going to be chased by Tigers!!!". It's irrational now, but fora kid I faced that strong reality with faith, courage and much fear. "Ok God," I'd pray, "if you came by fire and by cloud, then you canprotect me from tigers....right?" I'd say my 'amens' with a lump in mythroat.

Now days I know it's much different. I've been in fulltime missions for a bit over 3 years now and...I've never been toAfrica. Sure I've seen my share of tigers, but they've all been behindbars, or dodgy-chain-link fences. Oh! I saw a sloth once! Uh...I was15 and it was ...slow. At any rate, 12 years after those prayers, I'mrealizing that being a missionary doesn't mean that you're going to bechased by Shere Khan. But it does mean you can still be Mowgli. Eventhough my departments are in accounts, e-mails and maintaining theweb-site you're probably reading this from, I can still live with asmuch faith, courage and fear as I once did when I was younger. I'm notsaying that I want my best friend to be a bear and I want to walkaround Belfast wearing a Loincloth but...then again talk about ahead-turner!

What I'm trying to say is that, to me, being a missionary means to behonest to your heart. To follow your heart, wherever it goes, and totrust that those desires are from the Father. That's how to beMowgli. To trust that the Lord is speaking to you through the desireof your heart and to go at it with full force. And if that's everthreatened, then don't run but turn and face your struggles with faith,courage and fear.

And don't forget, all tigers are afraid of burning bushes.

--
--mikey

I was in England last week, helping to run the children's programme for 5-7 year olds at a Family conference... and one of the children said something that I haven't been able to forget. Not because it was funny, not because it was innocent, but because it was true.

I asked them to think about the things that are in their heart. The general aim was that we'd have answers like "love for my mum" or "friendship with my best friend" or "patience" or "kindness". I set the question up, even gave them a general idea of what kind of answers I was looking for. you can picture the scene - lots of human skittles in front of me, all aching to be the one asked to give an answer... I got a few answers that fit the bill, but I've forgotten them.

Then the little lad answered. Bright & sparky - he was at the back of the group, and he spoke loudly. "Loneliness," he said. "there is Loneliness in my heart. Sometimes I think it's going to break. But it's an okay kind of loneliness. I don't have many friends". He was a chirpy little chap. He loved playing with the others. I think he was realising that loneliness is a part of life - taht there is a certain part of us that will never feel like we have totally shared it with another person. But he hadn't learnt the lesson of self-censorship yet. I didn't know what to say. So I said the only thing that I could.

That's the truth.

Never work with children or animals - they're sometimes cute and they sometimes speak the truth. I haven't been able to forget this.

In our work of Reconciliation with YWAM Belfast, I think that the acknowledgment that loneliness is a part of all of our lives - whatever groups we represent, whatever community we feel is ours, whatever flag we fly, whatever our motto is, whatever group we oppose, we all know a certain kind of loneliness - and this is an aching, heart-breaking kind of loneliness, when we allow it to speak - and it somehow is a voice that while one the one hand defines us as being alone, on the other hand builds bridges of community with other lonely belonging-seekers.

Never work with children or animals. They might just break you.
Pádraig

We have begun working in a school called Belfast Boys Model, running the Forgiveness Journey for pupils aged 12-14 years. We will be working with them for the next 6 weeks talking about how to live a lifestyle of forgiveness. We have met 3 of the 4 classrooms so far with one left to go on Thursday. So far they are a brilliant bunch of lads who are interested in the topic and eager to learn. Forgiveness isn't easy, as one of them said, because it is hard to let go of the anger. It will be an interesting journey... Becki

what an insane week this has been. i accidentally douoble booked visitors for the week - a friend i haven't actually seen in 22 years (sheesh, i'm old) and, well, my mum.

tabetha came over from CA, and the pull was to participate in one of our Silent Retreats. we leave for that this afternnon and i'll be bringing my mum as well. she's gonna help me with cooking the evening meal and setting up whatever else needs to be done before the participants arrive.

after this week, a retreat is exactly what i need to decompress! even though i'm actually on staff and will be working the retreat, the atmosphere and in genral and prayer/reflection times specifically are so amazingly refreshing. i alwasy feel cleansed when returning from one.

well, time to run and finish organisingv the garden and taking my mum out for the last few bits of stuff she needs to buy for my kids and me :-)

cheers! Amy

"You've been leading me beside strange waters, streams of beautiful lights in the night. But where is my pastureland in these dark valleys? If I loose my grip, will I take flight?" Bruce Cockburn from the song "Strange Waters"

So as staff we're trying to add more consistent blog messages and this is my attempt to write something of wisdom here.

Recently I was asked to speak at my church on the equally tricky and encouraging passage from Romans 8:26-30. The first verse of which says the following "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans."

Now I don't know about you but that verse is one of the many in the Bible that I would have a fairly compulsive need to immediately overlook out of a complete lack of any sense of what its getting at...the Holy Spirit intercedes for us with 'wordless groans'!!!

Every human being has to confront the reality of hard times, suffering, bereavement etc - there has been this crazy theory that somehow if we call ourselves Christians we get some kind of divine 'get out of jail' or 'get out of suffering' card. The reality of course for anyone who has lived on this earth for a few years is different - loss and hard times are part of life- at worst our prayer to God can be something like what Bono wrote "You gave me nothing, now it's all I got...". Of course most of us try and move on from that feeling of utter nothingness and desolation...but that process of moving from personal desolation to thankfulness, faith and hope can be a difficult one. Because it is so difficult I think many people chose the road of denial or of believing that somehow God planned our misfortune for some reason that will make perfect sense sometime in the future, and may even result in much personal wealth here on earth!!.

For myself, 2004 was a hard year. On Father's Day in June, my Dad passed away at the age of 71, a good age but still really premature for such a wonderful man who typified grace, thoughtfulness and gentleness. This event came a few years after I had sojourned through a period in my life that I can only describe as a type of 'dark night'. Both in my 'dark night' period and in the wake of Dad's death I was confronted by the harsh reality that life is not always fair, not always simple, and not always predictable. How does this get us to understanding a Holy Spirit that intercedes for us with 'wordless groans'...

Well I guess in preparing for this sermon I had to preach, I did a bit of research and reflection on the 'wordless groaner'...the conclusion I came to was that when we are having a hard time there are two ways of understanding the Holy Spirit's work as described in Romans 8, either -

1. The Holy Spirit is suspended somewhere in time and space between us and God, groaning away in a manner that somehow makes sense to God and is comforting to us (this is a weird picture to me), OR

2. Somehow in the hardest times in our life the times when we truely have no words to say, or no prayers to pray, and all we can do is gasp, sigh, or 'groan' - these groans of pain, of questioning, of "Why?!" become prayers to God that are somehow mystically infused with the Holy Spirit. In fact we could say that Paul is encouraging us that these groans are every bit as much spirit filled prayers as those we sing or pray at the most joy-filled and faith-filled moments in life.

I don't know about you but I find this outlook deeply encouraging. Richard Foster once said that faith is not the opposite of doubt, but on the contrary faith is the opposite of certainty. For faith to be faith there has to be an element of the unsure about it. The reality for all of us is that life is about journeying ahead with a deep faith, knowing that we have a Holy Spirit that is infusing our 'wordless groans' with his life and encouragement. Sometimes there seems to be darkness, but God is hearing our groans as 'Spirit-filled' prayers.

The wonderful Bruce Cockburn penned the song 'Strange Waters' and it is a typical Cockburn-take on Psalm 23. In it he sings these words - "Lord, you've been leading me beside strange waters, streams of beautiful lights in the night. But where is my pastureland in these dark valleys? If I loose my grip, will I take flight?" For me these words capture the beautiful journey of following Jesus, the journey that is sometimes marked by confusion, hurt, mis-understanding, and loss. Yet it is also a journey we take with an 'encourager', a 'counsellor', one who intercedes for us with 'wordless groans'. Peace, Jonny

P.S. This is a photo of my Dad and Mum - John and Val Clark, pioneers of YWAM Northern Ireland from 1984-1994. One day I'll see my wonderful Father again.


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Jonny Clark
YWAM Belfast
www.belfast.ywamni.com