faithactionreconciliation

Pádraig, the man I work with has a new pair of jeans. Flowery ones. I laugh at him. He says the jeans have a point... It's all about the love!
This week in Northern Ireland has signalled political leaders who have previously sworn to not engage with each other enter into government with jokes, laughter, assurances of political collaboration. A miracle. It's all about the Love.
I'm aware that Forgiveness, for all the technicalities of who, when, why, how long, etc. is all about the Love.
But I'm still not going to admire Pádraig's jeans!

Talk to you next week... Becki.

We were out at a youth group last night, doing the third of six Forgiveness Journey sessions with them... this week we were looking at Revenge. We spoke about Revenge as being violent, or subtle, causing damage, or causing hurt, in response to a hurt that's been experienced. People spoke about how Revenge always needs to get the person back in a manner that is more hurtful, or more artfully malicious than the initial hurt. In our discussions together, it seemed that many people felt it was important to stick up for ourselves... The question was put out - Why do we take Revenge? What is it about us that feels that the way to validate our hurt is to take Revenge?
Adam Philips, a London psychotherapist, and seemingly well known amongst the psychological community, speaks of Revenge turning our "Rupture into story". Somehow the ability to bounce back and "get them back" with a "taste of their own medicine", whether quickly, or "as a dish best served cold" makes us feel like we are alive. It makes us feel like we have worth. It is saying "I have worth because I have the ability to hurt my perpetrator back".

A fascinating rationale! It is using violence to validate the rupture caused by violence. Yet, I know in my own bones that I can seek this ironic (and dangerous) sense of validation.

Forgiveness calls us to validate our pain in another way. It calls us not to quick or violent responses, but rather to sink into the ground of our own dignity. it calls us to consider that the person who has hurt us is a person. Even if they are depersonalizing themselves by acting inhumanely, Forgiveness always calls us to recognize the dignity, personhood & humanity of each individual and gain our identity and assurance from that as a fact, rather than our fleeting capacity to hurt them with greater magnitude than they hurt us. We will not gain any true self assuredness by returning violence for violence. We must sink deep into the ground of our heart and find dignity where it was placed - in the gift of life, in the breath of God that animates our bodies. We must rise from the dust of revenge and live as creatures of bone & flesh with hearts enlivened by the Spirit of God who loves us dearly.

I was checking out the latest blog by XXXchurch recently on their myspace when I came across an interesting debate that was happening in the Blog Comment area. If you're not familiar, XXXchurch is a moving church body who openly tackle the issue of pornography. They host mens breakfasts, open debates and even attend Pornography Festivals spreading out tracks and offering prayer. Their slogan, "We're not telling you what to do or not do here, but if you think you have a problem and you want help, we're here for you." (ok so it's a long slogan but who can knock that?!)

On their latest myspace blog, X3church told about the recent protesting that went on at one of their Great Porn Debates. I guess a lot of people showed up with picket signs to protest such a topic. Dealing with this issue will of course bring up conflict within the Christian body but my question isn't, "Why are we arguing?!" but rather "How are we arguing?"

It's hard to recall just how many people I have meet through the years, who have been burdened and hurt by the Church. Just last summer I was in downtown Belfast, skating in the city square when I started talking to these two kids. They noticed a picture of Jesus hanging on my key-ring and asked me if I was a Christian. "Well...yes." I said "I am a Christian. Are you two?" One of the boys said his mom is and the other paused...."I hate Christians", he said.
After talking with the kids a bit longer I found out that both of them were bi-sexual and both have had a lot of problems with the Christian Religion. "If who I am is such a 'sin' then why should I believe in your faith?" I was amazed to find out how well they spoke their Christian jargon with me. These boys have obviously been around Christians before, but..in Northern Ireland it's hard not too. I spoke with them for awhile longer and to my surprise, they sure had loads of questions. "What about hell?" "Is it okay to be gay and be christian?" "Does Jesus still love me if I'm gay?" "Why are you still talking with us?" That last question threw my back a bit. These kids were shocked to see that I haven't done either of what they expected; I didn't tell them to Turn or Burn, and I didn't walk away. I sat with them and I listened to their stories and I tried to handle their questions.
I left later that day knowing that I probably just gave them the greatest thing they could of asked for from a Christian...I gave them my time. I think that...some people want answers but everyone wants time.

So whether you're Craig Gross, debating the issue of Porn with Ron Jeremy in front of hundreds, or you're confronted by an angst teen about Homosexuality, or maybe you're talking about Abortion to a new friend in a coffee shop. I encourage you (and myself) to give the best gift you can give in those conversations...your time.



to find out more about XXXchurch and the Great Porn Debate please visit these sites:

www.xxxchurch.com/
www.porndebate.com



--
--mikey

So this week has been quite crazy but good. The lads at Belfast Boys Model School can be quite insightful about their city. We have been posing the question about what Belfast would look like if the people here would stop taking revenge on each other and start forgiving each other. Many said it would help bring down the walls and one lad in particular said that Belfast would seem bigger. We asked what he meant and he said that the city would be bigger for him because he would be able to go anywhere instead of only being able to go into the areas on his side of the wall. Quite a deep thought for a 13 year old boy - "the city would be bigger".
That comment will stay with me for awhile and I will probably tell this story over again for a long time. Thanks for reading. Cheers.

Yesterday was a brand new experience for me- I joined a samba band! It took me ages to figure out how to do the bells I was playing but I finally got it. The band is part of an initiative for women from interface areas of Belfast. Living in North Belfast pretty much automatically qualifies me. The other ladies in the band have been doing this for 5 weeks already but I felt pretty okay because they messed up every now and again as well. The first weekend in June will be a residential up at Corrymeela- woo hoo!!! I'm also looking forward to practicing with help from Jon, my drum playing hubby. I want to do this right!

I'm in Harpenden, north of London, for a few days, talking with a "Peace & Diplomacy Internship" being run by the YWAM centre here. We have been attempting to examine how it is that people of different creeds, with different ideas of the necessary outworkings of those creeds can engage in meaningful dialogue together, where the individuality of each is respected, but also where the deep ground of our common humanity is honoured & shared... I've been very impressed by the writings of Reuven Firestone and thought that I'd put some of his quotes here.

A Jew speaks to Muslims about the need to listen to Jesus

In the sermon on the mount, Jesus declared blessed are the peacemakers for they will be called children of God. The term children of God does not ring well to Muslims, because it suggests that God has children and partners in the godhead. Suggesting such a thing is called shirk in Arabic, or Association. …but the term in Matthew is a metaphor, and it is fair and honest to read it as such. Jesus does not suggest that God has children or partners. The suggestion, rather, is that as humans created with the divine image, when we make peace awe active our greatest potential of emulating God, the merciful and compassionate. The Qur’an teaches that, even if your most bitter enemy should show signs of moving in the direction of peace, you must do the same. “and if they incline toward peace, you must also include toward it”. Judaism teaches the same in Psalm 34”13-15.

Love, although the greatest of emotion,s is not always possible. we are only mortal human beings, only flesh and blood. Sometimes we just cannot love those whom we perceive as hating us. But if you cannot love them, you can still argue with them. Speak, talk, discuss, drink tea with them. Take your people to visit their mosques and churches, and invite them to visit your own. let them know how you feel. If it does not go well, keep arguing. Complain, explain, dispute, and bicker. Organize others in your cities and towns and villages to do the same. Always keep your argument and your discussion leshem shamayim. Do it for yourselves, for your communities, for your future and the future of your children and your children children. Do it for God.